Friday, October 3

Interview With William Mortensen Vaughan

LA Libertad:  Where were you born?

WMV:  I was born in Brigham City, Utah, on October 5, 1962, but spent my first three years traveling with my parents, until we settled down briefly near Chicago, Illinois, where my father was born, and is buried, may he rest in peace.  I saw him smiling at me the day he died, so I learned early that dying happy is possible.  He died when I was three, so my mother moved to the Hollywood Hotel, in Salt Lake City, Utah, where I celebrated the first birthday I remember, which was my fifth.  People kept coming over to my mother's apartment, and giving me presents all day.  I asked my mother why this kept happening, and she told me that it was because I had "turned five" that day.  I grilled her on how exactly one went about "turning five," because I wanted to repeat that process every day!  [Laughs.]  Then we moved to Ogden, Utah, where I attended Head Start (hat tip, Black Panthers), elementary school, junior and senior high school, and college.  I graduated from Ben Lomond High School in 1981, and briefly attended Weber State College before in became a university.

LA Libertad:  What is your occupation?

WMV:  I am essentially my wife, Libertad Green's personal assistant and photographer.  I have probably taken more photographs of her than anyone else, even though she still gets paid to model by various photographers.  I also spend more time than she does editing and publishing her entertainment eZine, LA Libertad.

LA Libertad:  What do you love most about your work?

WMV:  Freedoom!  The freedom to work at home, with my wife, and set my own schedule.  Unlike the quarter of a century that I served in the military, when I was constantly waiting for phone calls to duty, day and night, my cell phone is off most of the time, now-a-days.  I've learned that people rarely want to talk to me, unless it's to try to persuade me to do something I don't want to do.  With nearly four years of experience in the entertainment industry under my belt, I have learned that most of the gigs I am likely to get as an actor or a model, I will initially be given via e-mail.  Sometimes people want to talk to me on the phone before they hire me, to get a "warm fuzzy" about me, but by then, they've decided I'm the guy they want, based on my e-mail application for their gig.  Therefore, I don't do auditions, or interviews, or anything like that.  Fuel is too expensive.  I don't recall ever getting a job in entertainment that I auditioned or interviewed for in person.

LA Libertad:  What talents and hobbies do you have?

Royal Stewart Mourning Tartan
WMV:  I can do one-armed push-ups and juggle.  I can also read, write, and speak Spanish fluently.  Although I have a thick accent, which I have never bothered to lose, I probably know more about Spanish than most native speakers.  Native English speakers often wonder how that can be, but know very little about English.  I am still in a state of shock after attending Westwood College and discovering how ignorant and uneducated most of their students are.  I met a lady with an Associate's Degree who didn't know what an underscore was called, let alone how to produce it on a keyboard or keypad!  What's really scary is that such ignorant, uneducated, drug-addicted people often end up in job positions with significant power and influence, like Mayor Ford of Toronto, for example.  Besides a lack of basic education, ignorance, and drug addiction, people in our society now-a-days too often embrace violent, criminal behavior.  The police regarded a man named Jeremy Meeks as one of the most dangerous gangsters in Stockton, California, but, apparently because he is so good looking, he received contract offers for modeling and television shows.  The world's general lack of morals and "common sense" is appalling!  In fact, "common sense" is becoming less and less common.

As for hobbies, I started collecting fish last spring.  I hadn't had fish since I was a child and had guppies and turtles.  I had seen Fantail Goldfish and Black Moors, but had never owned any, although I wanted to.  Then, last spring, for some strange reason, I decided it was time to have some.  Unfortunately, I learned the hard way how easily they can be killed.  So far I've lost  Negro I, Horacios I and II, copperhead, Hellboy Joe the crab, Velvet I, and Peanut - seven pets altogether.  I blame Seachem and their faulty products for most of their deaths; however, Velvet was just too old; she was a big, Black Moor who struggled just to move, especially to the surface to eat.  I left Peanut in a small jar with a Tank Nibblers' zucchini pellet.  Goldfish seem to love zucchini.  I've tried raw zucchini, a well the pellets; it's like catnip to them!

With the death of Peanut, I learned not to leave them in cloudy water.  Seachem's Li'l Alert Mates are useless; the gauge read yellow (in the safe range) when I found all of my fish and my crab dead in the water.  Now I use Jungle tablets to keep their water clean and for medicine.

Negro II (whom I started calling Negress, because she seems feminine to me) lost her right, front fin to disease.  By the time I realized something was eating it away, it was too late.  She also had a spot on her back, which started out looking like a grain of salt, and grew into two big, red sores.  I tried Melafix, which I still use to add a pleasant scent to my aquariums, but it didn't help Negress' wounds much.  Then I tried Jungle medicinal tablets and the wounds are gone!  Unfortunately, so is her right, front fin.  There's not even a stump there anymore.  I've started calling her "La Coja," which means "the female cripple," in Spanish.

I have another Black Moor whom I call "La Tuerta," which means "the one-eyed female," in Spanish. 

Horacia III, named after Horatio Caine on "C.S.I.:  Miami," is still missing the armor over the gill on her left side.  You can see the red flesh exposed.  No medicine seems to repair that.  Fortunately, she seems unaffected by this as far as her behavior.

I think she lost this piece of armor due to an attack by one of
Black Velvet and Jack-o'-Lanterns
our Siamese Fighting Fish, also known as Bettas.  I put one of them in the aquarium, and it soon started ramming the Goldfish, although they were perhaps ten times as large.  I don't like Siamese Fighting Fish as much as Fantail Goldfish and Black Moors.  Bettas aren't friendly, and I even find them creepy.  Goldfish are much more amicable and affectionate.  I admit, I even kiss them sometimes.  I've heard dolphins are also affectionate and like to kiss.

I have three aquariums now:  The Emerald City, the Pirate Tank, and the Seashell Tank.  I put the medicine in the Pirate Tank, and put La Coja, La Tuerta, Horacia III, and Velvet II in there.  Velvet II has a split belly fin; it's healing now.  I sometimes call the Pirate Tank "the Freak Show."

I also have a calico, Fantail Goldfish, named Calico.  He's my biggest, heaviest fish.  I usually leave him with Blackie, a small, Black Moor.

Even smaller are my two, tiny Black Moors, Cashew and Peanut II.  I wanted to call Peanut I "Moscone," because it looked like a big housefly, but my wife thought that was an ugly name for a cute fish.

When I bought Peanut II, I only meant to buy one tiny, Black Moor to replace Peanut I, but another got into the shopkeeper's net with the first, and refused to get out, so I bought them both, and decided that calling a fish that looked like a housefly "Cashew" made as much sense as calling it "Peanut."

My wife decided to add a blue Betta to our collection, so we have one named Peacock, because its tail reminds us of a peacock's tail, the way he spreads it.  We also have a red Betta, which we call "Red," and a female, which I named "Mudpie," because she's the color of mud, and I found her wallowing in her own feces, neglected on a shelf at Walmart.

My wife thinks I'm becoming a crazy fish geezer, akin the a crazy cat lady.  She's probably right.

Another hobby I indulge in more than ever before, is Black Jack and Liar's Dice, as seen in Pirates of the Caribbean:  Dead Man's Chest.  I have poker chips, cards and dice all over the house now.  I also play in various cyber casinos on my laptop, as well as on my wife's "smart" phone.  It's becoming such an obsession, I'm finally considering the purchase of a smart phone for myself.  I also play Black Jack in Leisure Suit Larry's Casino offline.

By the way, I first saw and played Liar's Dice as part of Leisure Suit Larry 7:  Love For Sail., and was surprised to see the Pirates of the Caribbean playing a version of it in Dead Man's Chest.

LA Libertad:  What inspires you?

WMV:  My wife inspires me.  A woman with no piercings or tattoos, or so much as a parking ticket on her police record!  A woman who was home schooled, but is more knowledgeable and educated than most people who go to college now-a-days!  I told one college student to her face, after reading one of her essays, that if my home-schooled wife saw that essay, she wouldn't believe its author had graduated from high school, let alone that it was a college essay.

Furthermore, my wife has amazing talent.  She can imitate anyone's voice or dance moves.  It gives me chills.  She has degenerative disk disease, and has suffered from chronic back pain since she was eleven years old, but you'd never know it, watching her dance or pose for photographers.  She has also survived sexual assault on three separate occasions, in different States.  Yet she keeps working all day, every day, to advance her careers in entertainment.  In a way, it's annoying, because we never just enjoy anything; every trip is a photo shoot; every place we go is a location.  I can't think of anyone I've worked with who had more of a work ethic than my wife.  I, on the other hand, am like a five-year-old in his fifties, who only wants to play. 

LA Libertad:  What is the hardest part of your job(s)?

WMV:  Seeing other people do well financially, in spite of their lack of education and morals, while my wife and I get rejected for superficial reasons, such as age and height.  I had no idea how important being young and tall was in Hollywood.  I also didn't realize how important nepotism was.  I knew Jane Fonda was Hank Fonda's daughter, but it wasn't until recently, when I started working in Hollywood, that I realized how common it is for famous entertainers to be the offspring or descendants of famous and/or wealthy people.  People such as Jay Leno and Tom Hanks who "make it" in Hollywood while living in their cars are the exception, not the rule.

LA Libertad:  What foreign languages, if any, do you read, write, and/or speak?

WMV:  Spanish, of course.  I also know some Portuguese, Italian, and German.

LA Libetad:  Where have you traveled?

WMV:  I've traveled and lived up and down the Americas, from Canada to Uruguay, and around the world, from Puerto Rico to what was West Germany, as well as Saudi Arabia and South Korea - on all continents except Africa and Antarctica.

LA Libertad:  What are your career goals?

WMV:  As far as I'm concerned, my careers (military and entertainment) are behind me.  I simply regard each day as a gift, and try to enjoy it as much as possible.  However, you can look for me as a prison guard, in scenes with Pepe Serna and Ayako Fujitani in Man From Reno, an M1 agent in Jurassic City, and as a security guard in Tangerine.

I am trying to lose about fifty pounds, but it's a struggle, especially now that I hold a Never Ending Pasta Pass at Olive Garden Italian Kitchens.  Oh, yeah!  I was one of only one thousand people to get such a pass.  I also bought one for my wife, but she's not as enthused about it as I am.

LA Libertad:  What projects are you working on?

WMV:  My wife is preparing to do a documentary to raise awareness of sexual assault and its aftermath. 

LA Libertad:  What upcoming events, if any, do you intend to participate in?

WMV:  My wife plans on making a trip across America to film her documentary.  I'm going to try to support her as much as reasonably possible.  It will be my first credit on IMDb as an Executive Producer.

LA Libertad:  What links would you like to share?


LA Libertad:  What else, if anything, would you like to tell our readers?

WMV:  I could go on and on, but the Editor-in-Chief would censor most of it, so, suffice it to say that I'm keeping an eye on the Mid-term Elections this year, and Benjamin Shapiro, Dinesh D'Souza, Trey Gowdy, Ben Carson, Darrell Issa, James O'Keefe, and Joe Arpaio are my heroes!  As are Kris (“Tanto”) Paronto,  Mark (“Oz”) Geist, and John (“Tig”) Tiegen...

Interview, cover, and photos by Libertad Green  

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